Let Go and Let God” were words that triggered me: How could I not try and fix the issues? How could I let things just be? And, If there was a God, why were these things happening to me? I always needed to feel in control and make sure that things would work out. For the first 40 years of my life, this was my normal way of dealing with life. My normal was to fix things for others, so I could feel more comfortable. I learned from a very young age that I needed to take control of everything and everyone so things could get done my way, because I thought I knew what was right or best for everyone.
As a young girl, I learned to take charge: to clean up after the alcoholic, to make sure others did not know what was happening behind closed doors, and to make sure that things were taken care of. As I became an adult, I acted the same way I had earlier observed my own mother doing. I found myself covering, protecting, doing, but most of all, I was spiraling down. I took things so personally. I believed that everything others said, did or participated in was my fault. I began to sabotage myself, blaming myself for the actions and decisions of others.
When I arrived in Al-anon in October 2024, I quickly learned about “Let Go and Let God.” Those words were crazy talk to me. How could I let go of my past, the pain and the history and give it to God? I could not even understand how to begin to do so. I read Al-Anon literature and heard many great speakers discuss how letting go and letting God helped them. I struggled with it. I quickly learned that my issue was not letting go; my issue was giving it to God. Once I realized this, I quickly realized why I did not have a relationship with my Higher Power. I was raised Catholic, but I didn’t have a relationship with God. I didn’t trust God. I didn’t think God loved me; I didn’t believe I was enough for God. How could I let go and let God when I felt all these negative feelings toward my Higher Power?
In 2025, I experienced what I never thought I would experience. My world collapsed and my reality became a horror story. I had been learning about “Let Go and Let God” and now it was time to put it into practice. I began by recognizing that I did have a Higher Power. My Higher Power was a mixture of what I had learned in childhood and some qualities that I needed it to have. My Higher Power was compassionate and understanding of me and who I am, and how my past has shaped me in positive and negative ways. Once I accepted my Higher Power, the next step was to understand that my Higher Power was with me through all the highs and lows of my life. My Higher Power was not judging me nor was he hurting me but instead was sitting by my side. In different ways, he was letting me know that I was ok, and things were happening not to me, but for me.
The first time I stated my problem out loud and gave it to God, I felt uneasy but at the same time comforted. I noticed that I was open to anything that would result from the problem: good or bad. I began to lose the need to control the problem. I could breathe and relax and accept that what my Higher Power had planned for me was the best for me regardless of whether I agreed or thought otherwise. “Let Go and Let God” became words that I would think, eat, sleep and use at home, work and when facing hardships. I learned that trusting my Higher Power and giving him all my problems supports my need to feel in control of the situation. “Let Go and Let God” are words that guide me to release what I have no control over; together they bring me inner peace.
Sincerely, Anonymous February 19, 2026
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